Nicknaming Neighbors…
I decided to post this after reading one of ZubeGirl’s latest posts. If you haven’t read her blog, it’s probably one of the funniest blogs out there… it’s definitely worth reading and coming back to read more.
Anyway, I’m sure that after “Friends” (ugly, hairy, naked guy) - nicknaming neighbors became popular. That’s not where we got the idea, in fact, we saw it on Friends later and it cracked us up because that’s what we do.
We’ve nicknamed our neighbors no matter where we’ve lived. But, for the last 8 years we’ve lived in a strange little neighborhood that we are trying like mad to get the heck out of now.
We have “Son of a Bitch” - because he is… for starters. But, we started saying this whenever he drove by. Remember the sequel to “A Christmas Story” with Charles Grodin and Mary Steenburgen? They were going to the World’s Fair and there was a cop in the intersection and as they drove by Charles Grodin says, “Son of a Bitch” in a really funny way, but kept looking straight ahead the whole time. That’s what we do whenever S.O.B. drives by…
Then we have “Neighbor Bill” aka “Godfather of the Neighborhood” - Bill is the one who will call some city agency if you leave your water running, don’t mow your lawn, have a broken down car on the street, etc. He sounds obnoxious, but he really is a cantankerous sweetheart.
“Daddy 9 Fingers” - a bum, never holds a job, lives off of his “wife” - and was attacked by his own Rottweiler which injured one of his fingers and he couldn’t go to work, thus got fired (again).
My all time favorite, until they moved, were the little newlywed couple in their early 20’s who rented the house next door to us. They were naive and thought they knew everything… they adopted two mutts and named them “Buzz” and “Woody” after the characters in Toy Story. The first time we encountered Tom, he was sitting on his back porch cleaning something. Mike said, “Hey, how’s it going?” and Tom replied, “OUTSTANDING!” just like that, loud and proud and very marine like. He liked guns… and illegal fireworks… he was probably one of the Dungeons and Dragons or Hobbit guys in High School.
Their nicknames? “Outstanding Tom and Girl Genius”
Our neighborhood is just sounding so “quaint” now, isn’t it?
See why we want to move?
Quickly.
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August 9th, 2005
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Posted in: Neighbors
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