At least not in this household…

Check out our lovely works of Halloween art - 100% edible, too!

These are the kids’ favorite “corpse finger cookies” that I make every Halloween. They are actually pretty freaky looking. So freaky that my mother refused to eat them even though I used one of her recipes to make them. ;o)

Currently, we are watching “Scariest Places on Earth” on ABC Family. Some really goofy teenagers spent the night in the Borden family home - as in Lizzie Borden. Eeeek!!

Amy's Musings Tales From An Anti-Soccer Mom  
Posted in: Personally
October 31st, 2005

I told Mike last night that we should nominate ourselves for David Letterman’s ’stupid family tricks’ after last night.

Kate had a recital at a local museum last night. I’ve described it before - but it’s a huge outdoor museum with old historic houses and buildings (hotels, saloons, jails, dental offices, etc.) that have been restored and filled with real antiques and old equipment, furniture and things that would have been used during that time period. The grounds are gorgeous with pathways, grassy areas, roses, and trees. Mike and I were married there…

Last night (and tonight) the museum held their ‘Safe Trick-or-Treat’ you had to buy tickets to attend and there were almost 40 “treat stations” set up on the porches and in the doorways of the different buildings. Sounds lovely, right?

Kate’s recital was held in the old Bandstand (a very old, beautiful, white gazebo). She had to be there at 5pm and we had to deliver her through the vendor’s entrance. Had we been just 15 more minutes late… we’d never have gotten a parking spot. (My mom tried to get in a little after it started and not only could she not get a parking spot but there was an accident due to STUPID DRIVERS right in front of her. She changed her mind and drove home!)

The museum was expecting about 2000 people last night and I’m pretty sure they got them… and then some. There were HUGE lines just to get up to each of the doors. We watched Kate play at the recital… took Maggie around a bit (she was dressed as a frog and my camera was messing up so I didn’t get any pictures… AUUUGH!) and then we bailed as fast as we could.

While attempting to find our way out of the museum we got stuck in a crowd of people. After several minutes Kate looks up at me and says, “Are we in a line?” I replied, “No, at least I hope we aren’t in a line… it’s not my intention to BE in a LINE!” and as if I had spoken the magic words… the sea of people parted and I heard several weary looking moms say, “She doesn’t mean to be in a line - let her through!!!”

We had been IN a line.

And, all we wanted to do was get back to our car.

Once we got home we realized that we had indeed had a very nice evening… we did see some very funny costumes and we did enjoy ourselves in spite of the fact that the crowds were annoying and they weren’t selling candied or caramel apples anywhere. We made do with fresh, hot Kettle corn and cotton candy.

But, I think next year we’ll stick to our neighborhood and enjoy a nice, traditional Halloween. ;o)

Tonight… I’m buying candy at Target, Mike is picking up pizzas on the way home, we are blacking out the house and settling in to watch the conclusion of “Most Haunted Live! The Hunt for Jack The Ripper” on the Travel Channel.

It always amazes me that such wonderful people keep coming back to read this blog and take the time to leave thoughtful comments, I really appreciate it. I wanted to take a second and say “Happy Halloween” to all of my awesome friends out in blogland! Hope you have a wonderful night!
Amy's Musings Tales From An Anti-Soccer Mom  
Posted in: Personally
October 31st, 2005

Mike finally has a full weekend off. This time of year things slow down just a bit and we actually saw him twice last week for dinner!

This morning he decided we all needed to pitch in and clean house. I’ve been running my rear end off all week (at least it certainly feels that way) and I’m tired… I was so looking forward to relaxing in bed until 10 or so and watching HGTV while dreaming of our soon-to-be new house.

Mr. Clean had other plans.

I made coffee (it took me 3 cups just to get up to normal speed) and helped him make breakfast. While he fried bacon I ran around throwing in loads of laundry and straightening things up. Then I made the eggs and we all finally sat down to breakfast.

It’s been more than a few hours since breakfast (I can’t recall exactly how many, it’s all such a blur) and everyone is still up and about. In fact, Mike is closing up the swamp coolers for the winter. Which means he’s on the roof.

Maggie is down for a nap and I am hiding in here at the computer because I’M TIRED!!!!!! I so wanted a nice, slow-paced Saturday.

Did I mention we had to drive out of town last night (almost an hour’s drive) for a friend’s birthday party? Don’t get me wrong - I wouldn’t have missed it… but that doesn’t mean I want to hop up this morning and play “chase the dust bunnies.”

Crap. There is a high school marching band practicing through our neighborhood. I kid you not.

There goes quiet…

I swear, if this wakes Maggie up… those are going to be some messy marching band uniforms… I PROMISE!!!!

Amy's Musings Tales From An Anti-Soccer Mom  
Posted in: Personally
October 29th, 2005

Spent the morning at the dentist. Ethan had 3 fillings and Kate had to have sealants. The appointment was for 9:30am, we didn’t get out of the office until noon. I was out in the waiting room with the angel. Maggie did well for the first hour but after that it was naptime and I had forgotten her bottle, she became extremely cranky.

Hell hath no fury as a 22 month old trapped in a dental office waiting room.

I had originally hoped that by scheduling an early appointment I would be able to get Ethan back to school to catch at least one class before lunch and the last two after lunch. I failed to remember that today was minimum day schedule, his classes were shorter and school let out an hour early.

By the time we arrived at the school, just as lunch was ending, he only had one class left. As he got out of the car he realized that he had not put his bookbag in the car. I could see forgetting it because we were in a hurry to get to his dental appointment, but we did stop back by the house after for Maggie’s bottle…

After 2 and half hours in a dental chair I can see why he might have forgotten though.

So, Ethan missed the entire day and a math test. Not that he would have been much good in math he was already falling asleep by the time we got to the school anyway.

It was a rough appointment.

I have 90% of the Christmas shopping done for the family. All I have to do is shop for the kids, Mike, and pick up their stocking stuffers. And, it’s not even Halloween! Yippee!

Amy's Musings Tales From An Anti-Soccer Mom  
Posted in: Personally
October 26th, 2005

I’m getting a freaking headache. I hate headaches.

I’ve chased the little demon darling all over the house this morning and have gotten her out of several scrapes. Including the one where my mom’s dog tackled her and pulled her shirt off. Jillie Bean firmly believes that Maggie is another puppy. Maggie doesn’t know what she is, exactly, but she’s fairly certain it doesn’t involve licking someone’s face, biting their ears, pulling the headbands out of their hair and then stripping them, that’s just not the way she treats company. I’m happy about this because I prefer my guests clothed with all their body parts dry and intact… I hope Maggs isn’t picking up any bad habits from Jillie.

For now, Maggie is bored with attempting to destroy things and break herself so she has climbed up into the chair behind me and is now headbutting me in the back of my head. I don’t think I ever did these types of things to my mom… she wouldn’t have tolerated it. I suppose I am tolerating it (for the moment) because if she is headbutting me and jabbering in my ear then I know where she is and that she isn’t trying to break anything, except me. I can bounce back… my mom’s Revolutionary War chess set? Not so much.

A few moments ago there was a knock on the door… I’m at my mom’s, she’s at a doctor’s appointment - I’m not going to answer the door. The dogs went ape and started barking their heads off and I told Maggie to “Shhh” which she obediently did and put her finger over her lips and whispered, “Shhh” back to me. But, then she realized that the dogs were not being so obedient and instead of politely telling them to “Shhh” she yelled at them to “Hush up!!!!”

The person had left and I glanced out the window to find a couple with bibles in hand.

This is why I don’t answer the door.

I’ll manage my own eternal salvation, thank you.
(Although, what in the blue blazes to these people do for a living that they can afford to be canvassing the neighborhood on a Tuesday morning? Oh well… not my problem, thankfully!)

Now, off to find the advil.

Amy's Musings Tales From An Anti-Soccer Mom  
Posted in: Personally
October 25th, 2005
21
Oct

Also Real…

Ok… some other interesting tid bits from my mom’s stay at the haunted rental house…

The dog’s balls would roll across the floor by themselves and usually when both dogs were lying at my mom’s feet. (Ok… UPDATE 10/22 - clarification - TOYS… the dog’s TOYS… only they were like TENNIS BALLS and baseballs because JJ really liked them. Good grief, I almost said, JJ liked balls.)

A white, whispy thing would drift back and forth down the hall toward the master bedroom and back towards the office.

Lights would flicker on and off.

The back yard was huge and part of it was sectioned off with a 6 foot tall fence, behind the fence was an area that had apparently been used to grow fruit trees. No matter how many times my mom would go out and close the gate to the back section she would find it standing wide open within 30 minutes to an hour or so after closing it.

My mom was putting things away and thought she saw my sister pass by the door and when she went to look, no one was there.

A small cat or dog could be seen, on occasion, darting behind furniture or around corners.

My mom’s dogs refused to go into the kitchen.

The first couple of weeks my sister stayed with friends as did my mom so my step-dad was there alone. He would sleep with the radio on in the bedroom because if he didn’t have a distraction he couldn’t sleep because of all the noises and “murmured” conversations coming from the direction of the common areas of the house.

Amy's Musings Tales From An Anti-Soccer Mom  
Posted in: Personally
October 21st, 2005

This time of year is full of ghosts, ghouls, haunts and what-not, isn’t it?

I took my kids to the dentist yesterday (he’s absolutely hilarious and a very cool dentist) and he told my daughter how he had it all planned that he was dressing up as Captain Jack Sparrow (Pirates of the Caribbean) or maybe he’s going as Barbosa… anyway, and that everyone else in the office was dressing up as his wenches (he’s the only male in the office) and they were going to do the whole “Pirates of the Caribbean” thing for Halloween. Kate thought that was pretty freaking cool. Especially given that Ethan thinks he is “too old” for Halloween and she had wanted Ethan to go as Captain Hook, GJ to go as Peter Pan, Maggie to go as Tinker Bell, and then she could go as Wendy. I have to admit that they would all look really cute…

Kate has a piano recital at a local museum. Although everyone here just refers to it as “Pioneer Village” there are all of these old buildings (houses, jail, dental office, watch shop, dress shops, school house, etc.) that were built over a 100 years ago when this town was a very different place. Actually, Mike and I were married there in the old church and our reception was outdoors on the “Chapel Green”. It’s a very cool place. On Halloween (and the day before because it is so popular) they do a “safe Trick or Treat” and have staff members at the doorway to all the buildings to hand out candy to the kids, the paths are lit with candles in paperbags filled with sand, and all of Katie’s piano teacher’s students will be playing various Autumn/Halloween music throughout the event.

We plan to take Maggie Trick or Treating around the museum while Kate plays. Ethan and my brother (GJ) have other plans. Pioneer Village is supposedly haunted… and Ethan and GJ plan to capture some orbs or something with digital cameras. We mentioned this to our dentist and he immediately launched into telling Ethan the best haunted spots. The watch shop is haunted, apparently the clocks stop and start all on their own. The old dental office is also haunted (something that amuses our dentist beyond belief… LOL). There are also a few other spots and needless to say Ethan and GJ are both looking forward to investigating themselves.

Amy's Musings Tales From An Anti-Soccer Mom  
Posted in: Personally
October 19th, 2005
18
Oct

Killer Klowns

Last Saturday night we went out for dinner at our favorite mexican restaurant. Our favorite waiter immediately brought me out the most awesome Mai Tai and after having one with appetizers I had to have another with dinner. Needless to say by the end of dinner I was feeling no pain whatsoever. Not that I was in any to begin with and gee, isn’t that just wasting a good Mai Tai?

We got home and had planned to watch a movie together. Instead Kate and I ended up on my bed watching Seinfeld and the guys ended up in the den watching something else. Around 2am I woke up to the TV on, still up at a pretty good volume and Mike snoring like a freight train next to me. The house was dark and it took several seconds for me to focus on the TV and by the time I could focus I was scrambling for the remote and Mike ended up with my elbow in his ear as I reached over to his nightstand to grab it.

There on the screen was a freaky looking clown loping around looking incredibly menacing.
(post updated 10/20 to include this pic - mainly so Zube girl can see what she missed. Although, I’m sure it doesn’t compare to The Grudge, unless clowns REALLY freak you out.)

Turns out “Killer Klowns From Outer Space” was a late night movie. Not something I enjoy waking up to. I had to turn on the Disney Channel for a good half hour before I could get back to sleep.

Ok, official the freaky clown story for the season is over at Marti’s blog “Digital Doorway - Enter The Laughter” you absolutely do not want to miss this post!

Amy's Musings Tales From An Anti-Soccer Mom  
Posted in: Personally
October 18th, 2005

I’ve washed my hands a few dozen times since I made dinner last night. I swear.

I just scratched my lip with my thumb nail and now it is on fire…

My lip, not my thumb nail.

I really hope that I don’t forget and accidentally rub my…

eyes… again.

Or anything else for that matter… can you imagine?

How long does it take for jalepeno residue to completely go away?

Amy's Musings Tales From An Anti-Soccer Mom  
Posted in: Personally
October 17th, 2005

(this is a series of posts about my estranged sister, Megan, originally started on her birthday Sept. 19. If you haven’t read parts 1, 2, or 3… this most likely will not make any sense to you. Sorry!)

Megan gradually became a distant stranger. She made noises, on occasion, to my mom that things were not as easy as she thought they might be. Financially she was having a tough time, although she didn’t admit to it, we could all tell by the tell-tale envelopes arriving almost daily addressed to her. Mom suggested she move back home. She told her that we respected her desire to be independent and to have a life of her own and that she understood if Megan felt that it was time to get out and have her own existence, but that it wasn’t worth it if she was putting herself in financial jeopardy to do it. This seemed to have no effect whatsoever. Reason and common sense appeared to be foreign concepts to her.

Pictured - Megan, Maggie (4most) and Mom

Conversations between my mom and Megan have become tense and superficial. The one or two times I saw Megan we barely spoke and she didn’t even really make eye contact. Megan told my mom that she was avoiding me because I was “too hostile.”

Apparently, frank + honest = Hostile, in Megan’s great, big, book of denial.

One of her new roommates was/ is a woman in her mid-thirties, recently divorced with two children. The kids lived with their father and from all accounts don’t want to have much, if anything, to do with their mom. A woman estranged from her children, sharing a two bedroom apartment with Megan and a guy in his late twenties… and this was someone my sister was now spending almost every moment with, taking advice from, and using as some sort of strange role model. It was as if she had found some sort of… surrogate mother-figure.

The environment she had plopped herself into was so far from the Megan we knew… it is almost impossible to give an accurate description. The apartment is in a not-so nice part of town, one of her roommates is a chain-smoking part-time actor, part-time bail bondsman and up until all this began, Megan had been allergic to cigarette smoke. The new environment was taking a toll, Megan went from caring somewhat about her appearance to being more like her roommates and caring practically nothing at all, she looked sloppy, her hair looked unkempt, she stunk like cigarettes and she had taken to going places (restaurants, movies, etc.) still dressed in her uniform from work.

Mid-July she tromped into my mom’s house with my dad, cousin, and her roommate in tow to move the rest of her furniture and things out of the house. Two days later she returned with boxes and snapped at my mom that she, “didn’t have any room for this stuff” and that my mom had a WHOLE house… even though my mom told her not to leave the boxes, Megan left them anyway…

Megan had once been extremely assertive, proactive and dependable. Now, she appears to be meek, timid, allowing this older woman to make decisions for her (hair, clothing, etc.), to drive her car and drop her off at work, and can’t seem to go anywhere without this woman accompanying her.

(pictured at left, Mom and Megan at Maggie’s 1st birthday party)

I later found out that my mom invited Megan to dinner for her birthday. Megan arrived with this older woman in tow and throughout the conversation they would cast “knowing” glances at one another as if everything my mom was saying and doing was “so predictable.”

My mom and I suspected that there might be more of a “romantic” relationship between the two of them. If this were the case, it’s certainly not something our family would have a problem with. We are extremely accepting and open-minded. When my mom asked Megan if this might be the case - Megan appeared offended at the suggestion and vehemently denied it. Which leaves us with only a few alternate suspicions as to what might be causing such dramatic and negative personality changes.

Now, anyone in their right mind might logically begin to suspect all the usual nasty habits that can lead to complete personality changes. Don’t think we haven’t thought of it all ourselves, we have. But, there just doesn’t seem to be any real evidence of that kind of thing going on. Of course, who can accurately make a statement like that when we only hear from her every 2-3 weeks? I have been around a few people with severe problems and Megan doesn’t quite fit that bill… but, what do I know.

Megan and Mini-Me (Kate) - New Year’s Day ‘05

I am unsure as to where things stand now. I miss my sister, but not the person she is now. Christmas time is just around the corner… that has always been a very special time of year for us. I can’t imagine not having the family together for Thanksgiving… I can’t begin to imagine Megan not being there for Christmas Eve.

It was just last year we started a new Christmas tradition, the entire family wears Christmas pajamas on Christmas Eve… we don’t do anything fancy and it’s just us, so it makes sense for everyone to hang around in something comfortable. This was something Megan and I came up with and I just can’t imagine her not being around to continue it. Still… the way she is now, I wouldn’t want her around to ruin it either.

My mom saw Megan a few weeks ago, she seems to stop in every once in a while to pick up her mail. Megan asked about the new house Mike and I are in the process of buying. Mom told her she should give me a call and ask me herself. Personally, I don’t care for Megan asking about me or that my Dad keeps her informed of my business. It’s almost like she is trying to keep a semblance of our relationship going without my being involved at all. That sounds wierd, I know… but I think somewhere she is in major denial and by keeping informed about the family’s comings and goings she can feel like she isn’t so estranged.

This has been a series of lengthy posts. Most of the time I’ve been trying to get all that has happened straight in my own mind, at other times I have just been trying to get it all off of my chest. I wish I had some sort of update or happy ending, but I suppose things in real life are never that neat and clean. I’ll keep you posted, but I sincerely doubt there is going to be any kind of a happy reconciliation any time soon.


Megan and I at Cedar Creek, Thanksgiving 2004
(FYI - I’ve lost weight since then…) ;o)

Update - The Final Chapter

Amy's Musings Tales From An Anti-Soccer Mom  
Posted in: My Soapbox
October 15th, 2005