(this is a series of posts about my estranged sister, Megan, originally started on her birthday Sept. 19. If you haven’t read parts 1, 2, or 3… this most likely will not make any sense to you. Sorry!)

Megan gradually became a distant stranger. She made noises, on occasion, to my mom that things were not as easy as she thought they might be. Financially she was having a tough time, although she didn’t admit to it, we could all tell by the tell-tale envelopes arriving almost daily addressed to her. Mom suggested she move back home. She told her that we respected her desire to be independent and to have a life of her own and that she understood if Megan felt that it was time to get out and have her own existence, but that it wasn’t worth it if she was putting herself in financial jeopardy to do it. This seemed to have no effect whatsoever. Reason and common sense appeared to be foreign concepts to her.

Pictured - Megan, Maggie (4most) and Mom

Conversations between my mom and Megan have become tense and superficial. The one or two times I saw Megan we barely spoke and she didn’t even really make eye contact. Megan told my mom that she was avoiding me because I was “too hostile.”

Apparently, frank + honest = Hostile, in Megan’s great, big, book of denial.

One of her new roommates was/ is a woman in her mid-thirties, recently divorced with two children. The kids lived with their father and from all accounts don’t want to have much, if anything, to do with their mom. A woman estranged from her children, sharing a two bedroom apartment with Megan and a guy in his late twenties… and this was someone my sister was now spending almost every moment with, taking advice from, and using as some sort of strange role model. It was as if she had found some sort of… surrogate mother-figure.

The environment she had plopped herself into was so far from the Megan we knew… it is almost impossible to give an accurate description. The apartment is in a not-so nice part of town, one of her roommates is a chain-smoking part-time actor, part-time bail bondsman and up until all this began, Megan had been allergic to cigarette smoke. The new environment was taking a toll, Megan went from caring somewhat about her appearance to being more like her roommates and caring practically nothing at all, she looked sloppy, her hair looked unkempt, she stunk like cigarettes and she had taken to going places (restaurants, movies, etc.) still dressed in her uniform from work.

Mid-July she tromped into my mom’s house with my dad, cousin, and her roommate in tow to move the rest of her furniture and things out of the house. Two days later she returned with boxes and snapped at my mom that she, “didn’t have any room for this stuff” and that my mom had a WHOLE house… even though my mom told her not to leave the boxes, Megan left them anyway…

Megan had once been extremely assertive, proactive and dependable. Now, she appears to be meek, timid, allowing this older woman to make decisions for her (hair, clothing, etc.), to drive her car and drop her off at work, and can’t seem to go anywhere without this woman accompanying her.

(pictured at left, Mom and Megan at Maggie’s 1st birthday party)

I later found out that my mom invited Megan to dinner for her birthday. Megan arrived with this older woman in tow and throughout the conversation they would cast “knowing” glances at one another as if everything my mom was saying and doing was “so predictable.”

My mom and I suspected that there might be more of a “romantic” relationship between the two of them. If this were the case, it’s certainly not something our family would have a problem with. We are extremely accepting and open-minded. When my mom asked Megan if this might be the case - Megan appeared offended at the suggestion and vehemently denied it. Which leaves us with only a few alternate suspicions as to what might be causing such dramatic and negative personality changes.

Now, anyone in their right mind might logically begin to suspect all the usual nasty habits that can lead to complete personality changes. Don’t think we haven’t thought of it all ourselves, we have. But, there just doesn’t seem to be any real evidence of that kind of thing going on. Of course, who can accurately make a statement like that when we only hear from her every 2-3 weeks? I have been around a few people with severe problems and Megan doesn’t quite fit that bill… but, what do I know.

I am unsure as to where things stand now. I miss my sister, but not the person she is now. Christmas time is just around the corner… that has always been a very special time of year for us. I can’t imagine not having the family together for Thanksgiving… I can’t begin to imagine Megan not being there for Christmas Eve.

It was just last year we started a new Christmas tradition, the entire family wears Christmas pajamas on Christmas Eve… we don’t do anything fancy and it’s just us, so it makes sense for everyone to hang around in something comfortable. This was something Megan and I came up with and I just can’t imagine her not being around to continue it. Still… the way she is now, I wouldn’t want her around to ruin it either.

My mom saw Megan a few weeks ago, she seems to stop in every once in a while to pick up her mail. Megan asked about the new house Mike and I are in the process of buying. Mom told her she should give me a call and ask me herself. Personally, I don’t care for Megan asking about me or that my Dad keeps her informed of my business. It’s almost like she is trying to keep a semblance of our relationship going without my being involved at all. That sounds wierd, I know… but I think somewhere she is in major denial and by keeping informed about the family’s comings and goings she can feel like she isn’t so estranged.

This has been a series of lengthy posts. Most of the time I’ve been trying to get all that has happened straight in my own mind, at other times I have just been trying to get it all off of my chest. I wish I had some sort of update or happy ending, but I suppose things in real life are never that neat and clean. I’ll keep you posted, but I sincerely doubt there is going to be any kind of a happy reconciliation any time soon.

Megan and I at Cedar Creek, Thanksgiving 2004
(FYI - I’ve lost weight since then…) ;o)

Update - The Final Chapter

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

(this is a series of posts about my estranged sister, Megan, originally started on her birthday Sept. 19. If you haven’t read parts 1, 2, or 3… this most likely will not make any sense to you. Sorry!)

Megan gradually became a distant stranger. She made noises, on occasion, to my mom that things were not as easy as she thought they might be. Financially she was having a tough time, although she didn’t admit to it, we could all tell by the tell-tale envelopes arriving almost daily addressed to her. Mom suggested she move back home. She told her that we respected her desire to be independent and to have a life of her own and that she understood if Megan felt that it was time to get out and have her own existence, but that it wasn’t worth it if she was putting herself in financial jeopardy to do it. This seemed to have no effect whatsoever. Reason and common sense appeared to be foreign concepts to her.

Pictured - Megan, Maggie (4most) and Mom

Conversations between my mom and Megan have become tense and superficial. The one or two times I saw Megan we barely spoke and she didn’t even really make eye contact. Megan told my mom that she was avoiding me because I was “too hostile.”

Apparently, frank + honest = Hostile, in Megan’s great, big, book of denial.

One of her new roommates was/ is a woman in her mid-thirties, recently divorced with two children. The kids lived with their father and from all accounts don’t want to have much, if anything, to do with their mom. A woman estranged from her children, sharing a two bedroom apartment with Megan and a guy in his late twenties… and this was someone my sister was now spending almost every moment with, taking advice from, and using as some sort of strange role model. It was as if she had found some sort of… surrogate mother-figure.

The environment she had plopped herself into was so far from the Megan we knew… it is almost impossible to give an accurate description. The apartment is in a not-so nice part of town, one of her roommates is a chain-smoking part-time actor, part-time bail bondsman and up until all this began, Megan had been allergic to cigarette smoke. The new environment was taking a toll, Megan went from caring somewhat about her appearance to being more like her roommates and caring practically nothing at all, she looked sloppy, her hair looked unkempt, she stunk like cigarettes and she had taken to going places (restaurants, movies, etc.) still dressed in her uniform from work.

Mid-July she tromped into my mom’s house with my dad, cousin, and her roommate in tow to move the rest of her furniture and things out of the house. Two days later she returned with boxes and snapped at my mom that she, “didn’t have any room for this stuff” and that my mom had a WHOLE house… even though my mom told her not to leave the boxes, Megan left them anyway…

Megan had once been extremely assertive, proactive and dependable. Now, she appears to be meek, timid, allowing this older woman to make decisions for her (hair, clothing, etc.), to drive her car and drop her off at work, and can’t seem to go anywhere without this woman accompanying her.

(pictured at left, Mom and Megan at Maggie’s 1st birthday party)

I later found out that my mom invited Megan to dinner for her birthday. Megan arrived with this older woman in tow and throughout the conversation they would cast “knowing” glances at one another as if everything my mom was saying and doing was “so predictable.”

My mom and I suspected that there might be more of a “romantic” relationship between the two of them. If this were the case, it’s certainly not something our family would have a problem with. We are extremely accepting and open-minded. When my mom asked Megan if this might be the case - Megan appeared offended at the suggestion and vehemently denied it. Which leaves us with only a few alternate suspicions as to what might be causing such dramatic and negative personality changes.

Now, anyone in their right mind might logically begin to suspect all the usual nasty habits that can lead to complete personality changes. Don’t think we haven’t thought of it all ourselves, we have. But, there just doesn’t seem to be any real evidence of that kind of thing going on. Of course, who can accurately make a statement like that when we only hear from her every 2-3 weeks? I have been around a few people with severe problems and Megan doesn’t quite fit that bill… but, what do I know.

I am unsure as to where things stand now. I miss my sister, but not the person she is now. Christmas time is just around the corner… that has always been a very special time of year for us. I can’t imagine not having the family together for Thanksgiving… I can’t begin to imagine Megan not being there for Christmas Eve.

It was just last year we started a new Christmas tradition, the entire family wears Christmas pajamas on Christmas Eve… we don’t do anything fancy and it’s just us, so it makes sense for everyone to hang around in something comfortable. This was something Megan and I came up with and I just can’t imagine her not being around to continue it. Still… the way she is now, I wouldn’t want her around to ruin it either.

My mom saw Megan a few weeks ago, she seems to stop in every once in a while to pick up her mail. Megan asked about the new house Mike and I are in the process of buying. Mom told her she should give me a call and ask me herself. Personally, I don’t care for Megan asking about me or that my Dad keeps her informed of my business. It’s almost like she is trying to keep a semblance of our relationship going without my being involved at all. That sounds wierd, I know… but I think somewhere she is in major denial and by keeping informed about the family’s comings and goings she can feel like she isn’t so estranged.

This has been a series of lengthy posts. Most of the time I’ve been trying to get all that has happened straight in my own mind, at other times I have just been trying to get it all off of my chest. I wish I had some sort of update or happy ending, but I suppose things in real life are never that neat and clean. I’ll keep you posted, but I sincerely doubt there is going to be any kind of a happy reconciliation any time soon.

Megan and I at Cedar Creek, Thanksgiving 2004
(FYI - I’ve lost weight since then…) ;o)

Update - The Final Chapter

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

(this is a series of posts about my estranged sister, Megan, originally started on her birthday Sept. 19. If you haven’t read parts 1, 2, or 3… this most likely will not make any sense to you. Sorry!)

Megan gradually became a distant stranger. She made noises, on occasion, to my mom that things were not as easy as she thought they might be. Financially she was having a tough time, although she didn’t admit to it, we could all tell by the tell-tale envelopes arriving almost daily addressed to her. Mom suggested she move back home. She told her that we respected her desire to be independent and to have a life of her own and that she understood if Megan felt that it was time to get out and have her own existence, but that it wasn’t worth it if she was putting herself in financial jeopardy to do it. This seemed to have no effect whatsoever. Reason and common sense appeared to be foreign concepts to her.

Pictured - Megan, Maggie (4most) and Mom

Conversations between my mom and Megan have become tense and superficial. The one or two times I saw Megan we barely spoke and she didn’t even really make eye contact. Megan told my mom that she was avoiding me because I was “too hostile.”

Apparently, frank + honest = Hostile, in Megan’s great, big, book of denial.

One of her new roommates was/ is a woman in her mid-thirties, recently divorced with two children. The kids lived with their father and from all accounts don’t want to have much, if anything, to do with their mom. A woman estranged from her children, sharing a two bedroom apartment with Megan and a guy in his late twenties… and this was someone my sister was now spending almost every moment with, taking advice from, and using as some sort of strange role model. It was as if she had found some sort of… surrogate mother-figure.

The environment she had plopped herself into was so far from the Megan we knew… it is almost impossible to give an accurate description. The apartment is in a not-so nice part of town, one of her roommates is a chain-smoking part-time actor, part-time bail bondsman and up until all this began, Megan had been allergic to cigarette smoke. The new environment was taking a toll, Megan went from caring somewhat about her appearance to being more like her roommates and caring practically nothing at all, she looked sloppy, her hair looked unkempt, she stunk like cigarettes and she had taken to going places (restaurants, movies, etc.) still dressed in her uniform from work.

Mid-July she tromped into my mom’s house with my dad, cousin, and her roommate in tow to move the rest of her furniture and things out of the house. Two days later she returned with boxes and snapped at my mom that she, “didn’t have any room for this stuff” and that my mom had a WHOLE house… even though my mom told her not to leave the boxes, Megan left them anyway…

Megan had once been extremely assertive, proactive and dependable. Now, she appears to be meek, timid, allowing this older woman to make decisions for her (hair, clothing, etc.), to drive her car and drop her off at work, and can’t seem to go anywhere without this woman accompanying her.

(pictured at left, Mom and Megan at Maggie’s 1st birthday party)

I later found out that my mom invited Megan to dinner for her birthday. Megan arrived with this older woman in tow and throughout the conversation they would cast “knowing” glances at one another as if everything my mom was saying and doing was “so predictable.”

My mom and I suspected that there might be more of a “romantic” relationship between the two of them. If this were the case, it’s certainly not something our family would have a problem with. We are extremely accepting and open-minded. When my mom asked Megan if this might be the case - Megan appeared offended at the suggestion and vehemently denied it. Which leaves us with only a few alternate suspicions as to what might be causing such dramatic and negative personality changes.

Now, anyone in their right mind might logically begin to suspect all the usual nasty habits that can lead to complete personality changes. Don’t think we haven’t thought of it all ourselves, we have. But, there just doesn’t seem to be any real evidence of that kind of thing going on. Of course, who can accurately make a statement like that when we only hear from her every 2-3 weeks? I have been around a few people with severe problems and Megan doesn’t quite fit that bill… but, what do I know.

I am unsure as to where things stand now. I miss my sister, but not the person she is now. Christmas time is just around the corner… that has always been a very special time of year for us. I can’t imagine not having the family together for Thanksgiving… I can’t begin to imagine Megan not being there for Christmas Eve.

It was just last year we started a new Christmas tradition, the entire family wears Christmas pajamas on Christmas Eve… we don’t do anything fancy and it’s just us, so it makes sense for everyone to hang around in something comfortable. This was something Megan and I came up with and I just can’t imagine her not being around to continue it. Still… the way she is now, I wouldn’t want her around to ruin it either.

My mom saw Megan a few weeks ago, she seems to stop in every once in a while to pick up her mail. Megan asked about the new house Mike and I are in the process of buying. Mom told her she should give me a call and ask me herself. Personally, I don’t care for Megan asking about me or that my Dad keeps her informed of my business. It’s almost like she is trying to keep a semblance of our relationship going without my being involved at all. That sounds wierd, I know… but I think somewhere she is in major denial and by keeping informed about the family’s comings and goings she can feel like she isn’t so estranged.

This has been a series of lengthy posts. Most of the time I’ve been trying to get all that has happened straight in my own mind, at other times I have just been trying to get it all off of my chest. I wish I had some sort of update or happy ending, but I suppose things in real life are never that neat and clean. I’ll keep you posted, but I sincerely doubt there is going to be any kind of a happy reconciliation any time soon.

Megan and I at Cedar Creek, Thanksgiving 2004
(FYI - I’ve lost weight since then…) ;o)

Update - The Final Chapter

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

(this is a series of posts about my estranged sister, Megan, originally started on her birthday Sept. 19. If you haven’t read parts 1, 2, or 3… this most likely will not make any sense to you. Sorry!)

Megan gradually became a distant stranger. She made noises, on occasion, to my mom that things were not as easy as she thought they might be. Financially she was having a tough time, although she didn’t admit to it, we could all tell by the tell-tale envelopes arriving almost daily addressed to her. Mom suggested she move back home. She told her that we respected her desire to be independent and to have a life of her own and that she understood if Megan felt that it was time to get out and have her own existence, but that it wasn’t worth it if she was putting herself in financial jeopardy to do it. This seemed to have no effect whatsoever. Reason and common sense appeared to be foreign concepts to her.

Pictured - Megan, Maggie (4most) and Mom

Conversations between my mom and Megan have become tense and superficial. The one or two times I saw Megan we barely spoke and she didn’t even really make eye contact. Megan told my mom that she was avoiding me because I was “too hostile.”

Apparently, frank + honest = Hostile, in Megan’s great, big, book of denial.

One of her new roommates was/ is a woman in her mid-thirties, recently divorced with two children. The kids lived with their father and from all accounts don’t want to have much, if anything, to do with their mom. A woman estranged from her children, sharing a two bedroom apartment with Megan and a guy in his late twenties… and this was someone my sister was now spending almost every moment with, taking advice from, and using as some sort of strange role model. It was as if she had found some sort of… surrogate mother-figure.

The environment she had plopped herself into was so far from the Megan we knew… it is almost impossible to give an accurate description. The apartment is in a not-so nice part of town, one of her roommates is a chain-smoking part-time actor, part-time bail bondsman and up until all this began, Megan had been allergic to cigarette smoke. The new environment was taking a toll, Megan went from caring somewhat about her appearance to being more like her roommates and caring practically nothing at all, she looked sloppy, her hair looked unkempt, she stunk like cigarettes and she had taken to going places (restaurants, movies, etc.) still dressed in her uniform from work.

Mid-July she tromped into my mom’s house with my dad, cousin, and her roommate in tow to move the rest of her furniture and things out of the house. Two days later she returned with boxes and snapped at my mom that she, “didn’t have any room for this stuff” and that my mom had a WHOLE house… even though my mom told her not to leave the boxes, Megan left them anyway…

Megan had once been extremely assertive, proactive and dependable. Now, she appears to be meek, timid, allowing this older woman to make decisions for her (hair, clothing, etc.), to drive her car and drop her off at work, and can’t seem to go anywhere without this woman accompanying her.

(pictured at left, Mom and Megan at Maggie’s 1st birthday party)

I later found out that my mom invited Megan to dinner for her birthday. Megan arrived with this older woman in tow and throughout the conversation they would cast “knowing” glances at one another as if everything my mom was saying and doing was “so predictable.”

My mom and I suspected that there might be more of a “romantic” relationship between the two of them. If this were the case, it’s certainly not something our family would have a problem with. We are extremely accepting and open-minded. When my mom asked Megan if this might be the case - Megan appeared offended at the suggestion and vehemently denied it. Which leaves us with only a few alternate suspicions as to what might be causing such dramatic and negative personality changes.

Now, anyone in their right mind might logically begin to suspect all the usual nasty habits that can lead to complete personality changes. Don’t think we haven’t thought of it all ourselves, we have. But, there just doesn’t seem to be any real evidence of that kind of thing going on. Of course, who can accurately make a statement like that when we only hear from her every 2-3 weeks? I have been around a few people with severe problems and Megan doesn’t quite fit that bill… but, what do I know.

I am unsure as to where things stand now. I miss my sister, but not the person she is now. Christmas time is just around the corner… that has always been a very special time of year for us. I can’t imagine not having the family together for Thanksgiving… I can’t begin to imagine Megan not being there for Christmas Eve.

It was just last year we started a new Christmas tradition, the entire family wears Christmas pajamas on Christmas Eve… we don’t do anything fancy and it’s just us, so it makes sense for everyone to hang around in something comfortable. This was something Megan and I came up with and I just can’t imagine her not being around to continue it. Still… the way she is now, I wouldn’t want her around to ruin it either.

My mom saw Megan a few weeks ago, she seems to stop in every once in a while to pick up her mail. Megan asked about the new house Mike and I are in the process of buying. Mom told her she should give me a call and ask me herself. Personally, I don’t care for Megan asking about me or that my Dad keeps her informed of my business. It’s almost like she is trying to keep a semblance of our relationship going without my being involved at all. That sounds wierd, I know… but I think somewhere she is in major denial and by keeping informed about the family’s comings and goings she can feel like she isn’t so estranged.

This has been a series of lengthy posts. Most of the time I’ve been trying to get all that has happened straight in my own mind, at other times I have just been trying to get it all off of my chest. I wish I had some sort of update or happy ending, but I suppose things in real life are never that neat and clean. I’ll keep you posted, but I sincerely doubt there is going to be any kind of a happy reconciliation any time soon.

Megan and I at Cedar Creek, Thanksgiving 2004
(FYI - I’ve lost weight since then…) ;o)

Update - The Final Chapter

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

(this is a series of posts about my estranged sister, Megan, originally started on her birthday Sept. 19. If you haven’t read parts 1, 2, or 3… this most likely will not make any sense to you. Sorry!)

Megan gradually became a distant stranger. She made noises, on occasion, to my mom that things were not as easy as she thought they might be. Financially she was having a tough time, although she didn’t admit to it, we could all tell by the tell-tale envelopes arriving almost daily addressed to her. Mom suggested she move back home. She told her that we respected her desire to be independent and to have a life of her own and that she understood if Megan felt that it was time to get out and have her own existence, but that it wasn’t worth it if she was putting herself in financial jeopardy to do it. This seemed to have no effect whatsoever. Reason and common sense appeared to be foreign concepts to her.

Pictured - Megan, Maggie (4most) and Mom

Conversations between my mom and Megan have become tense and superficial. The one or two times I saw Megan we barely spoke and she didn’t even really make eye contact. Megan told my mom that she was avoiding me because I was “too hostile.”

Apparently, frank + honest = Hostile, in Megan’s great, big, book of denial.

One of her new roommates was/ is a woman in her mid-thirties, recently divorced with two children. The kids lived with their father and from all accounts don’t want to have much, if anything, to do with their mom. A woman estranged from her children, sharing a two bedroom apartment with Megan and a guy in his late twenties… and this was someone my sister was now spending almost every moment with, taking advice from, and using as some sort of strange role model. It was as if she had found some sort of… surrogate mother-figure.

The environment she had plopped herself into was so far from the Megan we knew… it is almost impossible to give an accurate description. The apartment is in a not-so nice part of town, one of her roommates is a chain-smoking part-time actor, part-time bail bondsman and up until all this began, Megan had been allergic to cigarette smoke. The new environment was taking a toll, Megan went from caring somewhat about her appearance to being more like her roommates and caring practically nothing at all, she looked sloppy, her hair looked unkempt, she stunk like cigarettes and she had taken to going places (restaurants, movies, etc.) still dressed in her uniform from work.

Mid-July she tromped into my mom’s house with my dad, cousin, and her roommate in tow to move the rest of her furniture and things out of the house. Two days later she returned with boxes and snapped at my mom that she, “didn’t have any room for this stuff” and that my mom had a WHOLE house… even though my mom told her not to leave the boxes, Megan left them anyway…

Megan had once been extremely assertive, proactive and dependable. Now, she appears to be meek, timid, allowing this older woman to make decisions for her (hair, clothing, etc.), to drive her car and drop her off at work, and can’t seem to go anywhere without this woman accompanying her.

(pictured at left, Mom and Megan at Maggie’s 1st birthday party)

I later found out that my mom invited Megan to dinner for her birthday. Megan arrived with this older woman in tow and throughout the conversation they would cast “knowing” glances at one another as if everything my mom was saying and doing was “so predictable.”

My mom and I suspected that there might be more of a “romantic” relationship between the two of them. If this were the case, it’s certainly not something our family would have a problem with. We are extremely accepting and open-minded. When my mom asked Megan if this might be the case - Megan appeared offended at the suggestion and vehemently denied it. Which leaves us with only a few alternate suspicions as to what might be causing such dramatic and negative personality changes.

Now, anyone in their right mind might logically begin to suspect all the usual nasty habits that can lead to complete personality changes. Don’t think we haven’t thought of it all ourselves, we have. But, there just doesn’t seem to be any real evidence of that kind of thing going on. Of course, who can accurately make a statement like that when we only hear from her every 2-3 weeks? I have been around a few people with severe problems and Megan doesn’t quite fit that bill… but, what do I know.

I am unsure as to where things stand now. I miss my sister, but not the person she is now. Christmas time is just around the corner… that has always been a very special time of year for us. I can’t imagine not having the family together for Thanksgiving… I can’t begin to imagine Megan not being there for Christmas Eve.

It was just last year we started a new Christmas tradition, the entire family wears Christmas pajamas on Christmas Eve… we don’t do anything fancy and it’s just us, so it makes sense for everyone to hang around in something comfortable. This was something Megan and I came up with and I just can’t imagine her not being around to continue it. Still… the way she is now, I wouldn’t want her around to ruin it either.

My mom saw Megan a few weeks ago, she seems to stop in every once in a while to pick up her mail. Megan asked about the new house Mike and I are in the process of buying. Mom told her she should give me a call and ask me herself. Personally, I don’t care for Megan asking about me or that my Dad keeps her informed of my business. It’s almost like she is trying to keep a semblance of our relationship going without my being involved at all. That sounds wierd, I know… but I think somewhere she is in major denial and by keeping informed about the family’s comings and goings she can feel like she isn’t so estranged.

This has been a series of lengthy posts. Most of the time I’ve been trying to get all that has happened straight in my own mind, at other times I have just been trying to get it all off of my chest. I wish I had some sort of update or happy ending, but I suppose things in real life are never that neat and clean. I’ll keep you posted, but I sincerely doubt there is going to be any kind of a happy reconciliation any time soon.

Megan and I at Cedar Creek, Thanksgiving 2004
(FYI - I’ve lost weight since then…) ;o)

Update - The Final Chapter

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

(if you haven’t read parts 1 and 2 - this probably won’t make much sense to you)

So, Megan refused to even tell us where she was staying. Instead she would just say, “at a friend’s apartment.” After some rather pointed questions from my mom she finally divulged that it was “Greg’s apartment,” but nothing more than that.

In a family like ours, you just don’t tease people with secrets. It doesn’t work. I hate to make my mom and I sound that way… but if you flaunt things like that (as Megan was doing, constantly, these series of posts are really a Reader’s Digest version, I’m not even scraping the tip of the ice berg here) eventually we’ll decide to find out… at almost any cost. We aren’t a family who keeps secrets. Especially between my mom, sister and I. There’s never been any need. We’d accept anything, love and support each other no matter what. That’s the truth.

One afternoon Ethan, GJ, Kate, and I decided to stake out the grocery store where Megan worked. I was tired of my mom worrying where Megan was staying, if she was safe, or if she was in a decent part of town. My mom’s worrying made me worry… I’ve already got three kids to worry about adding my 25 year old sister to the list was not something I wanted to do.

We waited for an hour or so for her to get off work. Then we watched as she came out and hopped into her 4-Runner. The 4-Runner with the Mickey Mouse antennae ball that Kate and picked out for her on our last trip to Disneyland… the 4-Runner with the license plate frame that read, “Raised on Milk… and Disney,” the 4-Runner that just a year and half earlier Megan had laughed at me as I attempted to climb up into it while 8 months pregnant with Maggie. The 4-Runner that 95% of the time is now driven by Megan’s roommate with Megan in the passenger seat for some very strange reason.

Weaving in and out of traffic we followed Megan from one end of town almost to the other. When she headed downtown I wasn’t worried, when we followed her to the edge of downtown, where it began to get seedy, I began to worry. I finally found her car parked at an apartment complex surrounded by a chain link fence with razor wire ran along the top. This wasn’t a bad apartment complex, it was clean and most of the cars were nice. But, the area was less than… prime. It was scary… seedy… icky. And, this is where my sister was choosing to sleep at night rather than the beautifully decorated bedroom in a very nice part of town less than 2 minutes from work.

I think it was late April when Megan came in to pick up more clothes and pack for a trip. She and her new friends (now roommates) were going to the beach for the weekend. She was 25 years old, an adult, she could come and go as she pleased as she had gone out of her way to demonstrate. Still, we’re a close family, my husband and I don’t go out of town without at least letting my mom know where we are going and where we will be staying. No one demands this, we aren’t that kind of family, it’s just a common courtesy, and quite frankly, it’s just good common sense.

Megan blatantly avoided telling us where she was going or where she would be staying, either by changing the subject or simply refusing to answer when we asked. And, no one was grilling her, it was just friendly interest, common conversation, and it was very strange that she was so secretive of her plans.

That Friday when I knew she was on her way out of town I decided to call her and have a heart-to-heart with her. I explained to her that we were worried about her, she was acting so different and that we just wanted to make sure she was safe. She told me she had already told Mom where she was going and where she would be staying, an outright lie. Then her story became hazy as she admitted to not having a cemented plan on where she was staying. I asked her to call me when she got to a hotel so that we would know she had arrived safely… she promised she would. She never did.

My sister is not known for being a liar. In fact, just a year ago if you had asked me if my sister lied I would have told you there was a better chance of my being struck by lightening on a clear day. For her to make a promise and deliberately not keep it was so out of the ordinary that I was too surprised to be hurt.

Mother’s Day - she didn’t even call our mom, which is BEYOND unusual. We didn’t hear from her on the 4th of July either. My mom’s birthday came and went with just a phone call…

To Be Continued…

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

(if you haven’t read parts 1 and 2 - this probably won’t make much sense to you)

So, Megan refused to even tell us where she was staying. Instead she would just say, “at a friend’s apartment.” After some rather pointed questions from my mom she finally divulged that it was “Greg’s apartment,” but nothing more than that.

In a family like ours, you just don’t tease people with secrets. It doesn’t work. I hate to make my mom and I sound that way… but if you flaunt things like that (as Megan was doing, constantly, these series of posts are really a Reader’s Digest version, I’m not even scraping the tip of the ice berg here) eventually we’ll decide to find out… at almost any cost. We aren’t a family who keeps secrets. Especially between my mom, sister and I. There’s never been any need. We’d accept anything, love and support each other no matter what. That’s the truth.

One afternoon Ethan, GJ, Kate, and I decided to stake out the grocery store where Megan worked. I was tired of my mom worrying where Megan was staying, if she was safe, or if she was in a decent part of town. My mom’s worrying made me worry… I’ve already got three kids to worry about adding my 25 year old sister to the list was not something I wanted to do.

We waited for an hour or so for her to get off work. Then we watched as she came out and hopped into her 4-Runner. The 4-Runner with the Mickey Mouse antennae ball that Kate and picked out for her on our last trip to Disneyland… the 4-Runner with the license plate frame that read, “Raised on Milk… and Disney,” the 4-Runner that just a year and half earlier Megan had laughed at me as I attempted to climb up into it while 8 months pregnant with Maggie. The 4-Runner that 95% of the time is now driven by Megan’s roommate with Megan in the passenger seat for some very strange reason.

Weaving in and out of traffic we followed Megan from one end of town almost to the other. When she headed downtown I wasn’t worried, when we followed her to the edge of downtown, where it began to get seedy, I began to worry. I finally found her car parked at an apartment complex surrounded by a chain link fence with razor wire ran along the top. This wasn’t a bad apartment complex, it was clean and most of the cars were nice. But, the area was less than… prime. It was scary… seedy… icky. And, this is where my sister was choosing to sleep at night rather than the beautifully decorated bedroom in a very nice part of town less than 2 minutes from work.

I think it was late April when Megan came in to pick up more clothes and pack for a trip. She and her new friends (now roommates) were going to the beach for the weekend. She was 25 years old, an adult, she could come and go as she pleased as she had gone out of her way to demonstrate. Still, we’re a close family, my husband and I don’t go out of town without at least letting my mom know where we are going and where we will be staying. No one demands this, we aren’t that kind of family, it’s just a common courtesy, and quite frankly, it’s just good common sense.

Megan blatantly avoided telling us where she was going or where she would be staying, either by changing the subject or simply refusing to answer when we asked. And, no one was grilling her, it was just friendly interest, common conversation, and it was very strange that she was so secretive of her plans.

That Friday when I knew she was on her way out of town I decided to call her and have a heart-to-heart with her. I explained to her that we were worried about her, she was acting so different and that we just wanted to make sure she was safe. She told me she had already told Mom where she was going and where she would be staying, an outright lie. Then her story became hazy as she admitted to not having a cemented plan on where she was staying. I asked her to call me when she got to a hotel so that we would know she had arrived safely… she promised she would. She never did.

My sister is not known for being a liar. In fact, just a year ago if you had asked me if my sister lied I would have told you there was a better chance of my being struck by lightening on a clear day. For her to make a promise and deliberately not keep it was so out of the ordinary that I was too surprised to be hurt.

Mother’s Day - she didn’t even call our mom, which is BEYOND unusual. We didn’t hear from her on the 4th of July either. My mom’s birthday came and went with just a phone call…

To Be Continued…

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

(if you haven’t read parts 1 and 2 - this probably won’t make much sense to you)

So, Megan refused to even tell us where she was staying. Instead she would just say, “at a friend’s apartment.” After some rather pointed questions from my mom she finally divulged that it was “Greg’s apartment,” but nothing more than that.

In a family like ours, you just don’t tease people with secrets. It doesn’t work. I hate to make my mom and I sound that way… but if you flaunt things like that (as Megan was doing, constantly, these series of posts are really a Reader’s Digest version, I’m not even scraping the tip of the ice berg here) eventually we’ll decide to find out… at almost any cost. We aren’t a family who keeps secrets. Especially between my mom, sister and I. There’s never been any need. We’d accept anything, love and support each other no matter what. That’s the truth.

One afternoon Ethan, GJ, Kate, and I decided to stake out the grocery store where Megan worked. I was tired of my mom worrying where Megan was staying, if she was safe, or if she was in a decent part of town. My mom’s worrying made me worry… I’ve already got three kids to worry about adding my 25 year old sister to the list was not something I wanted to do.

We waited for an hour or so for her to get off work. Then we watched as she came out and hopped into her 4-Runner. The 4-Runner with the Mickey Mouse antennae ball that Kate and picked out for her on our last trip to Disneyland… the 4-Runner with the license plate frame that read, “Raised on Milk… and Disney,” the 4-Runner that just a year and half earlier Megan had laughed at me as I attempted to climb up into it while 8 months pregnant with Maggie. The 4-Runner that 95% of the time is now driven by Megan’s roommate with Megan in the passenger seat for some very strange reason.

Weaving in and out of traffic we followed Megan from one end of town almost to the other. When she headed downtown I wasn’t worried, when we followed her to the edge of downtown, where it began to get seedy, I began to worry. I finally found her car parked at an apartment complex surrounded by a chain link fence with razor wire ran along the top. This wasn’t a bad apartment complex, it was clean and most of the cars were nice. But, the area was less than… prime. It was scary… seedy… icky. And, this is where my sister was choosing to sleep at night rather than the beautifully decorated bedroom in a very nice part of town less than 2 minutes from work.

I think it was late April when Megan came in to pick up more clothes and pack for a trip. She and her new friends (now roommates) were going to the beach for the weekend. She was 25 years old, an adult, she could come and go as she pleased as she had gone out of her way to demonstrate. Still, we’re a close family, my husband and I don’t go out of town without at least letting my mom know where we are going and where we will be staying. No one demands this, we aren’t that kind of family, it’s just a common courtesy, and quite frankly, it’s just good common sense.

Megan blatantly avoided telling us where she was going or where she would be staying, either by changing the subject or simply refusing to answer when we asked. And, no one was grilling her, it was just friendly interest, common conversation, and it was very strange that she was so secretive of her plans.

That Friday when I knew she was on her way out of town I decided to call her and have a heart-to-heart with her. I explained to her that we were worried about her, she was acting so different and that we just wanted to make sure she was safe. She told me she had already told Mom where she was going and where she would be staying, an outright lie. Then her story became hazy as she admitted to not having a cemented plan on where she was staying. I asked her to call me when she got to a hotel so that we would know she had arrived safely… she promised she would. She never did.

My sister is not known for being a liar. In fact, just a year ago if you had asked me if my sister lied I would have told you there was a better chance of my being struck by lightening on a clear day. For her to make a promise and deliberately not keep it was so out of the ordinary that I was too surprised to be hurt.

Mother’s Day - she didn’t even call our mom, which is BEYOND unusual. We didn’t hear from her on the 4th of July either. My mom’s birthday came and went with just a phone call…

To Be Continued…

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

(if you haven’t read parts 1 and 2 - this probably won’t make much sense to you)

So, Megan refused to even tell us where she was staying. Instead she would just say, “at a friend’s apartment.” After some rather pointed questions from my mom she finally divulged that it was “Greg’s apartment,” but nothing more than that.

In a family like ours, you just don’t tease people with secrets. It doesn’t work. I hate to make my mom and I sound that way… but if you flaunt things like that (as Megan was doing, constantly, these series of posts are really a Reader’s Digest version, I’m not even scraping the tip of the ice berg here) eventually we’ll decide to find out… at almost any cost. We aren’t a family who keeps secrets. Especially between my mom, sister and I. There’s never been any need. We’d accept anything, love and support each other no matter what. That’s the truth.

One afternoon Ethan, GJ, Kate, and I decided to stake out the grocery store where Megan worked. I was tired of my mom worrying where Megan was staying, if she was safe, or if she was in a decent part of town. My mom’s worrying made me worry… I’ve already got three kids to worry about adding my 25 year old sister to the list was not something I wanted to do.

We waited for an hour or so for her to get off work. Then we watched as she came out and hopped into her 4-Runner. The 4-Runner with the Mickey Mouse antennae ball that Kate and picked out for her on our last trip to Disneyland… the 4-Runner with the license plate frame that read, “Raised on Milk… and Disney,” the 4-Runner that just a year and half earlier Megan had laughed at me as I attempted to climb up into it while 8 months pregnant with Maggie. The 4-Runner that 95% of the time is now driven by Megan’s roommate with Megan in the passenger seat for some very strange reason.

Weaving in and out of traffic we followed Megan from one end of town almost to the other. When she headed downtown I wasn’t worried, when we followed her to the edge of downtown, where it began to get seedy, I began to worry. I finally found her car parked at an apartment complex surrounded by a chain link fence with razor wire ran along the top. This wasn’t a bad apartment complex, it was clean and most of the cars were nice. But, the area was less than… prime. It was scary… seedy… icky. And, this is where my sister was choosing to sleep at night rather than the beautifully decorated bedroom in a very nice part of town less than 2 minutes from work.

I think it was late April when Megan came in to pick up more clothes and pack for a trip. She and her new friends (now roommates) were going to the beach for the weekend. She was 25 years old, an adult, she could come and go as she pleased as she had gone out of her way to demonstrate. Still, we’re a close family, my husband and I don’t go out of town without at least letting my mom know where we are going and where we will be staying. No one demands this, we aren’t that kind of family, it’s just a common courtesy, and quite frankly, it’s just good common sense.

Megan blatantly avoided telling us where she was going or where she would be staying, either by changing the subject or simply refusing to answer when we asked. And, no one was grilling her, it was just friendly interest, common conversation, and it was very strange that she was so secretive of her plans.

That Friday when I knew she was on her way out of town I decided to call her and have a heart-to-heart with her. I explained to her that we were worried about her, she was acting so different and that we just wanted to make sure she was safe. She told me she had already told Mom where she was going and where she would be staying, an outright lie. Then her story became hazy as she admitted to not having a cemented plan on where she was staying. I asked her to call me when she got to a hotel so that we would know she had arrived safely… she promised she would. She never did.

My sister is not known for being a liar. In fact, just a year ago if you had asked me if my sister lied I would have told you there was a better chance of my being struck by lightening on a clear day. For her to make a promise and deliberately not keep it was so out of the ordinary that I was too surprised to be hurt.

Mother’s Day - she didn’t even call our mom, which is BEYOND unusual. We didn’t hear from her on the 4th of July either. My mom’s birthday came and went with just a phone call…

To Be Continued…

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!

(if you haven’t read parts 1 and 2 - this probably won’t make much sense to you)

So, Megan refused to even tell us where she was staying. Instead she would just say, “at a friend’s apartment.” After some rather pointed questions from my mom she finally divulged that it was “Greg’s apartment,” but nothing more than that.

In a family like ours, you just don’t tease people with secrets. It doesn’t work. I hate to make my mom and I sound that way… but if you flaunt things like that (as Megan was doing, constantly, these series of posts are really a Reader’s Digest version, I’m not even scraping the tip of the ice berg here) eventually we’ll decide to find out… at almost any cost. We aren’t a family who keeps secrets. Especially between my mom, sister and I. There’s never been any need. We’d accept anything, love and support each other no matter what. That’s the truth.

One afternoon Ethan, GJ, Kate, and I decided to stake out the grocery store where Megan worked. I was tired of my mom worrying where Megan was staying, if she was safe, or if she was in a decent part of town. My mom’s worrying made me worry… I’ve already got three kids to worry about adding my 25 year old sister to the list was not something I wanted to do.

We waited for an hour or so for her to get off work. Then we watched as she came out and hopped into her 4-Runner. The 4-Runner with the Mickey Mouse antennae ball that Kate and picked out for her on our last trip to Disneyland… the 4-Runner with the license plate frame that read, “Raised on Milk… and Disney,” the 4-Runner that just a year and half earlier Megan had laughed at me as I attempted to climb up into it while 8 months pregnant with Maggie. The 4-Runner that 95% of the time is now driven by Megan’s roommate with Megan in the passenger seat for some very strange reason.

Weaving in and out of traffic we followed Megan from one end of town almost to the other. When she headed downtown I wasn’t worried, when we followed her to the edge of downtown, where it began to get seedy, I began to worry. I finally found her car parked at an apartment complex surrounded by a chain link fence with razor wire ran along the top. This wasn’t a bad apartment complex, it was clean and most of the cars were nice. But, the area was less than… prime. It was scary… seedy… icky. And, this is where my sister was choosing to sleep at night rather than the beautifully decorated bedroom in a very nice part of town less than 2 minutes from work.

I think it was late April when Megan came in to pick up more clothes and pack for a trip. She and her new friends (now roommates) were going to the beach for the weekend. She was 25 years old, an adult, she could come and go as she pleased as she had gone out of her way to demonstrate. Still, we’re a close family, my husband and I don’t go out of town without at least letting my mom know where we are going and where we will be staying. No one demands this, we aren’t that kind of family, it’s just a common courtesy, and quite frankly, it’s just good common sense.

Megan blatantly avoided telling us where she was going or where she would be staying, either by changing the subject or simply refusing to answer when we asked. And, no one was grilling her, it was just friendly interest, common conversation, and it was very strange that she was so secretive of her plans.

That Friday when I knew she was on her way out of town I decided to call her and have a heart-to-heart with her. I explained to her that we were worried about her, she was acting so different and that we just wanted to make sure she was safe. She told me she had already told Mom where she was going and where she would be staying, an outright lie. Then her story became hazy as she admitted to not having a cemented plan on where she was staying. I asked her to call me when she got to a hotel so that we would know she had arrived safely… she promised she would. She never did.

My sister is not known for being a liar. In fact, just a year ago if you had asked me if my sister lied I would have told you there was a better chance of my being struck by lightening on a clear day. For her to make a promise and deliberately not keep it was so out of the ordinary that I was too surprised to be hurt.

Mother’s Day - she didn’t even call our mom, which is BEYOND unusual. We didn’t hear from her on the 4th of July either. My mom’s birthday came and went with just a phone call…

To Be Continued…

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!