Revenge Is A Dish Best Served…
covered in chocolate.
I bought my husband a new fishing pole, lures, and “special” fishing backpack to hold all of his crap fishing equipment, for Christmas.
Yesterday we got up and went hiking in the mountains for a few hours. Then we stopped at a pizza place with the most heavenly pizza of which I got to eat 2 slices while wrestling a 2 year old (she turns 2 on Sunday… I’m still trying to get used to the idea, so I’m starting early) who kept screaming, “Let go!!!!” This place was really small so they didn’t have highchairs… which meant I had to hold the demon Maggie on my lap.
On the other side of the booth sat my husband with a frosty mug of draft beer happily munching pizza and offering “helpful” suggestions as to how I might better manage Maggie.
Jackass.
She slept the entire way home, which meant that when she woke up she was brimming with refreshed energy.
Once we got home Mike started organizing his new fishing equipment so he could try it out the next morning at the lake. He assured me it would only take about 30 minutes to get it all together and then he’d take Maggie off my hands for a while.
It ended up taking 2 hours.
While Mike organized, I chased Maggie around the house. Exhausted, I decided that there was only one way to ensure that Mike had as interesting of a time with Maggie as I had. Maggie and I opened my box of See’s Candy that Mike had stuffed in my stocking.
Thirty minutes later my monkey daughter was hopping back and forth across my bed on her tiptoes singing at the top of her lungs and giggling at anything that came into view. She gathered all of her foam balls that were in her stocking and began tossing them around the room. She sprinted back and forth up and down the hall.
Finally, Mike came in to “relieve” me.
Me: Oh good, she’s all ready to spend time with Daddy!
Mike: Good! (watching her bouncing around with a look of worry on his face)
Me: And, I’m so sorry you missed it… but Maggie had her very first taste of See’s Candy tonight. She seems to prefer the Scotchmallows.
Mike: (look of panic on his face) What did I do to you?
It was a solid hour or so before Mike could sit down again. I managed to answer a few emails, reply to comments on my blog and laugh as Mike followed the whirling dirvish around the house cleaning up spilled coffee (that never would have happened on my watch… but then, I usually manage to stay a step or two ahead of her) and barely restraining Maggie before she leapt off of furniture or poked the dog’s eye out.
And, lest you thing I completely abandoned my darling husband (who at this moment is enjoying a peaceful fishing trip out at the lake while I wait for Maggie to wake up) I made sure to offer helpful suggestions and the occasional warning as he followed her around the house:
“Oh… she has a coffee mug!”
“Mike, she’s climbing up on my desk!”
“Oops! You better catch her I don’t think she should have that…”
Next time, he might keep his helpful suggestions to himself.
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December 27, 2005 @ 10:26 am
ROTF!
I remember those “chase-em” days! LOL
Thanks for renting your blog space to me!
December 27, 2005 @ 1:45 pm
OOO, you wicked, wicked woman! I love it!
December 27, 2005 @ 3:07 pm
That’ll teach him! … and I like your style :-)
December 27, 2005 @ 3:55 pm
Marti You are more than welcome! I’m so glad that one of my blog buddies put in a bid for the spot, too!
Crazy Lady Well, you know, if you don’t acquire a husband already trained, then you have to do it yourself… I prefer to use the “trial by fire” method of training.
tj Thanks! That’s a huge compliment coming from you, I’ve often admired the way you handle domestic situations!
December 27, 2005 @ 4:12 pm
Hee hee. Good for you. I HATE when people give me unsolicited advice. Hate. Guys used to try to teach me how to play pool, only little did they know that I was actually very good (not anymore), so I’d proceed to bat my eyelids and say, “Uh huh. Uh huh. Oh, you hold it like that. Okay.” Then I’d kick their butts. Hee. It was pretty fun.
January 10, 2006 @ 7:41 pm
See, that’s the beauty of text messages. I’ll be texting my future kids for sure. :-)
January 11, 2006 @ 9:04 am
“What did you do with your sister’s shoes?”
ROTF!
OMG, that is SO true!
Congratulations again on the design, it is beautiful!
January 11, 2006 @ 11:46 am
Your new design is beautiful, but I can’t see it worth a damn in Safari, my usual browser. Not to bitch or anythng- just wanted to let you know. I am the stunning genius that just figured out that i could open it in another browser…
January 11, 2006 @ 11:55 am
Zube! That’s certainly one solution, except that when I tried to text msg my son on the whole “ass” picture thing… he couldn’t read it because he was in class and obviously couldn’t respond either. Auuuugh!!!!!
Marti THe shoe thing… it is true, huh? I don’t get it. Kids have this way of just deciding that it ALL belongs to them if it is in their house.
Thanks again on the design, I think it’s perfect! :o)
Bonanza Thanks! Although, I’m the dork who has no clue what Safari is, or how I might go about fixing it. LOL
January 11, 2006 @ 9:34 pm
I absolutely LOVE your new design…and you are hysterical!
January 12, 2006 @ 12:12 pm
TJ aka Zazzafooky ;o) Thank you very much, I’m not sure which compliment there I like better but both are VERY much appreciated especially coming from you!