I’ve always had songs for my kids. They each sort of have their own. Maggie was different because she’s so different and nothing ever really seemed to fit. Then it dawned on me that I might have to tweak a song to get it to fit her properly. One day I started humming this tune and all the lyrics popped into my head and I had an aha! moment.

She climbs a tree
And scrapes her knee
Her dress has got a tear

She waltzes on her way to mass
And whistles on the stair
And underneath her wimple
She has curlers in her hair!
I’ve even heard her singing in the abbey

She’s always late for chapel,
But her penitence is real
She’s always late for everything
Except for every meal

I hate to have to say it but I very firmly feel

Maggie’s not an asset to the abbey

I’d like to say a word in her behalf:
Maggie makes me laugh

How do you solve a problem like Maggie?
How do you catch a cloud and pin it down?
How do you find a word that means Maggie?

A flibbertigibbet?
A will of a wisp
a clown

Many a thing you know you’d like tell her
Many a thing she ought to understand

But how do you make her stay?
And listen to all you say

how do you keep a wave upon the sand?

Oh how do you solve a problem like Maggie?

How do you hold a moon beam in your hand?

When I’m with her
I’m confused
Out of focus
And bemused
And I never know exactly where I am

Unpredictable as weather
She’s as flighty as a feather
She’s a darling
She’s a demon
She’s a lamb

She’d out pester any pest
Drive a hornet from its nest

She can throw a twirling dervish out of whirl
She is gentle
She is wild
She’s a riddle
She’s a child
She’s a headache
She’s an angel
She’s a girl!!

How do you solve a problem like Maggie?
How do you catch a cloud and pin it down?
How do you find a word that means Maggie?

A flibbertigibbet
A will of a wisp
A clown

Many a thing you know you’d like to tell her
Many a thing she ought to understand
But how do you make her stay?
And listen to all you say
How do you keep a wave upon the sand?
Oh how do you solve a problem like Maggie?
How do you hold a moon beam in your hand?

Lyrics from “The Sound of Music” by: Rodgers And Hammerstein
Tweaked by yours truly.

And the original: