Women are notoriously unkind to one another and although I don’t want to turn this into a political rant of any sort – at this time, more than any other, women ought to be banding together. We’ve been divided, ladies, let’s catch up to what is going on, political parties aside, and stand up before our daughters and granddaughters pay dearly for our complacency.

We all deserve the right to choose what is best for our lives and our bodies and no one has the right to make such personal calls for us. We should all be striving to preserve the right for all women to choose. You choose not to – great, that’s YOUR choice. For another woman her circumstances may dictate something else altogether – and you should support her right to make a CHOICE without harassment and without cruel and unwanted procedures. Once one type of CHOICE gets taken away – others are sure to follow.

It was brought to my attention the other day that women haven’t even had the right to vote for a hundred years yet and we’re in danger of going backwards. If you don’t make your voice heard today the women of tomorrow aren’t going to be heard at all.

And, with my rant aside – it’s kind of nice to find a place online where women are really trying to help each other out. So many of us rely on our inner circles and facebook friends that it’s awfully nice to see women in a mom forum hanging out and supporting one another with helpful advice and tips. Check it out, it’s pretty cool.

After my ranty post yesterday I thought I needed to clean it up a bit and give you another facet of my personality. I heard this song for the first time when Amy played it at a concert here in Bakersfield in 2008, I got to meet her that night too, words cannot begin to describe the thrill of getting to meet one of your heroes. She wrote this song based on something her older children’s grandmother used to say, beautiful words and lyrics we should all strive to live by… even me.

Kate uses part of the lyrics as her signature file in her email, I’m so proud of my kid she really does embody these lyrics.

“There’s so much good in the worst of us,
so much bad in the best of us,
it never makes sense for any of us,
to criticize the rest of us” -Amy Grant

I’ve been asked a bunch, Kate and I had the BEST time at the Blake Shelton concert. He really exceeded our expectations. Pics and more to come soon-ish.

Conversations between Katie and I are fast paced and a lot like muscle building supplements for your sense of humor. Not meant to offend actual muscle building supplements or the takers thereof and if you are interested in that sort of thing than by all means… umm…

Moving on.

This song:

Is Katie’s song. It applies to 99.9% of her relationships. In fact, I suspect when it comes time to end a relationship she just programs this song as the unfortunate fellow’s ringback tone. The following week they have lunch and discuss whatever they discuss as if nothing ever happened.

I wish I were joking. Well, not really because it beats the hell out of having one of those teenagers with a new romantic drama weekly.

Me: No, I really do appreciate your revolving door policy.

Her: Uh… thanks?

Me: Just makes things easier. I don’t get attached to anyone. And, you get good use out of your song.

Her: I should dedicate that to someone as a joke.

Me: No, don’t do that… then you’ll be the little girl who cried, “break up.” You don’t want to be that.

Katie fidgeting with Valentine’s Maggie received in the mail. She manages to knock a frog sticker loose.

Katie: Oh… my. Where did this come from?

Me: Good question. Way to go.

Katie: Should I just stick it somewhere?

Me: Yes… you should just… stick it.

Her: Oh… yes… are you proud of yourself there? One point for the mom, zero points for the teenager? Boost your self-esteem a little there?

Me: Have you seen me today? It’s going to take more than you and a loose frog sticker to fix this.

I turned 36 last week. Seriously, 36… and I’m just not vain enough to lie about my age. Mostly because I’m not noticing any new wrinkles or crow’s feet and I’m okay that the reason for this is simply because my face is just pudgy enough to fill them out.

Gray hairs… nope. None of those, thankfully. Although, who could tell, considering my stylist talked me into a platinum blonde streak (just one, bold and up front) and a few, ahem, teal peek-a-boo chunks hidden underneath here and there.

I’m happy, it’s cheaper than a sports car, boob lift, younger boyfriend and far more exciting than a rest home. ( Elder Care Portland )

I’m thinner this year than I have been in probably oh… 4 years at least. In fact, all my jeans are my skinny jeans even if skinny is in the eye of the beholder.

What did I do for this momentous occasion?

Earlier this month my husband gifted me with an early present, a Kindle Fire. One of my dearest friends, Chickie, sent me a box full of the most delicious smelling bath bombs on the planet just barely outdoing the shotglass/necklace and dancing chicken card from last year!

On my birthday my husband made me dinner and I was presented with a gift that almost got me a little teary. Non-plant people probably won’t get this… but through the years I’ve always had “dream plants” my husband always smiles and usually goes along with whatever I want to grow at the time. I’ve had beautiful hydrangeas, roses, butterfly bushes and crepe myrtles all gifts for my birthday, Mother’s Day or Easter.

But the Holy Grail, for me anyway, has always been a lilac tree. Holy Grail, indeed, I even found an old post mentioning my desire for a lilac tree:

My great grandmother used to say that the best cure for a headache was putting your hands in the dirt. She was absolutely right. What I would give to have the lilac tree that my grandmother transplanted to her backyard from my great grandmother’s yard!

My grandmother had a lilac tree in the backyard and it was easily one of my favorites of her plants. I knew she had grown it as a cutting from her mother and I believe it was from an original tree in Oklahoma. I had never really seen them around here or available at nurseries and so had given up on ever having one of my own.

Until a few weekends ago when a sunny day sent me perusing the garden section at Lowe’s. They had a huge selection of bare root lilacs. I sort of looked like Agnes in that scene from Despicable Me with the unicorn, there was all sorts of gasping and ooo’ing and ahh’ing and “I MUST HAVE THIS!!!!!!”

Mike grumbled, began asking questions like, where was I going to plant it? How big would it get? Was it going to be like that butterfly bush that has to be fought back from eating his redwoods 200 times a year?

My husband deserves a Golden Globe or Oscar or something because I barely spoke to him for the rest of the day for “dashing my dreams” and his follow up to the act at Lowe’s was to pretend he didn’t notice how annoyed I was with him.

Fast forward to my birthday when I was presented with what Maggie described as “an AMAZING CARD!!!!” which was a giant pop-up card with all sorts of cute, cartoon animals on it. I was later told it took her almost 45 minutes to pick out my birthday card (she took her assignment VERY seriously) and she probably molested every card with a puppy, kitty or other cute animal on it in the stands before selecting this card for it’s unique “pop up” feature.

After much time spent ooo’ing and aaah’ing (I do a ridiculous amount of this, no?) my TRULY AMAZING CARD (just in case Maggie reads this) I was presented with a lilac tree. Not just any lilac, but one my husband and daughter spent about as much time as Maggie with the birthday card, selecting just for me.

I’m really proud of it, but I’m going to spare you a full length picture because it’s only about 18″ tall and is essentially some sticks on a very short, skinny trunk. BUT… check out this beauty of a bud!!!!

I might have some LEAVES this year!!!!!!!

Did you know that 41 million women in the United States and 250 million worldwide are experiencing the chronic symptoms of menopause, ranging from hot flashes, anxiety, fatigue, anxiety, mood swings and decreased libido? With thousands more become menopausal each day, these chronic and disruptive symptoms, wrought by wildly fluctuating hormones, can negatively affect families, jobs, libidos and mental and physical states. – Gotmenopause.com

I’m on a bit of a health kick in recent posts. I just feel that now, more than ever, people need to be in touch with what is going on with their bodies. Menopause is not some taboo word that dare not be spoken, or relegated to harsh whispers of “the change” with dainty hand-covered mouths. The debate of HRT vs. homeopathic, diet and exercise alternatives rages on and personally, I don’t think there is one right blanket answer or remedy for everyone. For myself, I do feel it’s necessary to go as natural and organic as possible.

Menopause symptoms make for funny television shows but women know all too well that these types of issues haven’t exactly been on the front burner of modern medical science.

I’m no stranger to pharmaceutical intervention, while it’s necessary in some cases, I firmly believe that in most cases it’s not and prescriptions do not need to be handed out like candy.

It’s great to see informative websites popping up to cover women’s health issues like menopause. The more information the better and it shouldn’t just be relegated to conversations between patients and doctors (who were just taken out to lunch by their favorite pharmaceutical sales rep).

For too long hormones have been thought of something floating around in a woman’s head and appropriate attention hasn’t been given to the role they play. In many places (especially where I live) there are very few physicians willing to pay any attention to what role hormones play in your quality of life or how they contribute to health problems like diabetes, high blood pressure, heart disease, and thyroid problems. It seems like unless you are trying to get pregnant (fertility = big bucks!) they just don’t have the time or interest to find out what is causing your weight gain, hair loss, skin issues, headaches, or joint pain.

High blood pressure? Here is a pill. Losing your hair? Excess hair? Go get it waxed, it’s not a medical problem. Joint pain? Welcome to getting older, sweetheart. Weight gain? Clearly, you are lazy and need to diet and exercise more!

More and more it seems we are plugging the holes in the dam with bubble gum and band-aids instead of repairing the dam. I won’t get started on why but suffice it to say it always comes down to more money in pockets that are already big enough. Which is why it’s so important to take a proactive role in your health, no one else is going to advocate for you better than you. Not to mention that while most people have hidden agendas and bottom lines to keep an eye on – YOUR only agenda is a better quality of life and life is too short to blindly hand the maintenance of your health over to someone without question.

What do you do to be your own health care advocate? Do you have specific websites you rely on?

Summer is half over. I’m mildly annoyed because the school year for Maggie is starting back up August 16th. This would be the earliest we have ever started back to school. I’m trying to console myself with the fact that winter break is longer and we get out earlier next year. It’s not helping much, honestly.

Since summer vacation is on the downside it’s time to start cleaning out and getting rid of all the old stuff in the drawers and closets. This year I’m going a step further and going through my stored boxes of girls clothes to send to one of my dearest friends who is expecting a little girl in November!

In fact, I just finished up the sweetest little pumpkin hat for her. Isn’t that cute? I’m so excited. Secretly, I’m hoping she’ll get one of those little sleeping, naked newborn pics with the pumpkin hat on. So perfect for November! Have I mentioned that I’m ridiculously excited?

One of my dearest friends is pregnant, but she found out she was expecting when she was like 8 or 9 days along so it’s going to be the longest pregnancy in the history of pregnancies, not counting elephants, of course.

Okay, 8 or 9 days might be a slight exaggeration… slight. Still, we have what feels like months to go before she’ll finally find out what “flavor” she’s expecting. Most of us are hoping for a girl, even Mike has gotten in on wishful PINKing for them. Boys are always special and wonderful and certainly we’ll all be thrilled if she ends up with a healthy blue bundle. But, since she’s already a bonus parent to two boys I know a girl would be really special for them so I’m devoted to sending pink vibes their direction. Without a doubt this is the most important event this year!

As much as I love my boy it’s not quite as much fun looking at kids boutique clothing or
designer kids clothing for boys. Boys don’t get really creative with ruffles, bows, and buttons. You can’t put a boy in little ballerina socks with pink tutus around the ankles. While girls can go from polka dots to princess to ballerina, boys are relegated to toy trucks of all sorts, sports, dinosaurs, air planes and choo choo trains. Don’t get me wrong, those are fun as well, but once they get older they like to keep it simple with t-shirts, shorts and jeans. Boys are wonderfully uncomplicated in that respect, but girls are fun to accessorize with headbands and ribbons and shoes!!!

Katie and I are anxiously waiting because we’ve picked out some pretty, organic cotton yarn for knitting newborn hats. The new arrival is due in November which is the perfect time of year to have babies since it’s chilly and almost nothing is better than snuggling a pretty pink bundle in pretty blankets, footie pajamas and sweet hats.

It’s almost ridiculous how excited I am.

Somewhere in my heart of hearts I really am a girly-girl who loves pretty shoes. I just am not one of those girls who will do that whole “no pain no gain” thing when it comes to my feet looking pretty. The last time I was in Las Vegas I was hanging out at The Venetian late at night with some friends when a group of girls came squealing by us, they had obviously been partying long and hard at one of the clubs and I was horrified to see that one of the girls was carrying her shoes, running around barefoot because the backs of her heels had been reduced to bleeding, raw hunks of meat. Yeaaaaah… just not my thing.

Not that I haven’t earned a wicked blister or two dressing up for an important occasion. You probably won’t find Prada in my closet, okay, not “probably” more like definitely. But, it’s not that I’m plodding around in crocs, I just can’t bring myself to that. I am a Cali girl so I can always be found in flip-flops or sandals most of the year.

The thing is? I have seen a lot of women online who are self-admitted “shoe whores” and it makes me all the more adverse to that sort of thing simply because it seems so shallow and superficial. Not that I can’t be shallow and superficial… but my level of shallow and superficial doesn’t allow me to jam my feet into a pair of torture devices and teeter over my husband like Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise.

Still, if I were to really indulge my inner shoe whore with prada shoes I’d probably be leaning toward some things like this:

Can’t tell you why… I just like the way they look.

Isn’t there some statistic somewhere that says a huge (very scientific of me) percentage of household accidents happen in the bathroom? I always imagine toasters dropping into bathtubs (because often while I am in the tub I think of how lovely a piece of buttered toast might be) or hair dryers or people slipping and cracking their noggins on the edge of the tub. All of those are on the list of top bathroom mishaps that pop into my mind first, until I had a bit of a revelation recently.

How many of those bathroom accidents might be unfortunate fashion mishaps?

This occurred to me the other day when I advised Katie to “hop up on the toilet” to look in the bathroom vanity mirrors so she could see how a pair of shoes looked with her outfit. Seriously! Can you imagine? I didn’t think anything of it because as I teenager I thought nothing of perching precariously on the side of the tub or standing on the toilet to get a better look at my outfit!

Kate and I were rearranging her room a few weeks ago and I realized that I have never had full length floor mirrors in any house I’ve owned. Now that I’m paranoid about bathroom accidents I think I might remedy that immediately.

Oh for the days when buying panties meant tagging along with your mom and deciding between Care Bears and Strawberry Shortcake. Boys never really grow out of that. They stop in at Target or Costco and pick out a package of briefs or boxers in their size and move on along with their business.

Women never have it so easy. But, then again… there really isn’t much that is easy about being a woman, is there? Suffice it to say, much to my husband’s dismay (Well, not anymore, he’s well broken in now) I can’t just leap on any sign that says panties on sale and refresh my lingerie collection.

Although, the “lingerie” department at Target leads to me to believe that many women have no problem buying underwear in bulk. I’ve learned the hard way that it just doesn’t pay off to buy panties like men buy underwear, t-shirts and socks. Call me picky! I’m okay with that.

I’ve always really liked the Jockey brand but the only place to get a decent price on them is at the outlet and the closest outlet is about an hour away so it’s not something I go out of my way to do very often. I keep an eye out online for good deals on Jockey but they rarely come around. And, when they do it’s always some absolutely insane color combo (leopard print in fluorescent green? Really? No, thank you.) or it’s only a sale on pink panties which I would probably only indulge in if part of the proceeds went to the Susan G. Komen foundation or something. Not that I have a problem with pink. I just don’t wear a lot of it.

That being said I’m not the “spend $50 on a pair of panties because they promise supreme butt lifting” type either. Bras – that’s a whole other ballgame and suffice it to say – you get what you pay for 90% of the time!

Where are you shopping for your unmentionables that I just made all too mentionable? Any tips? Any sales?